Today's fortune: You will meet a man with a thong. He will give you a high five.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Douché - Hottest new clothing line, serving a purpose

Douché a subsidiary of Stryko LLC, fist-pumped its way into the market last month providing an innovative new purpose with its clothing.  "Camouflage Labeling" or CL is what they like to call it, and it will revolutionize the way people identify Douche Bags or DBs.  It's no news to anybody that DBs like to drop money on unnecessarily expensive clothing.  It's also a known fact that DBs are primitive imbeciles and should be avoided at all costs.  This brilliant merger between trendy douche must-haves and CL is what our astute public has been waiting for.  This service is essential in keeping mankind off the endangered species list.

These overpriced threads, meshed with archaic lettering, victorian wallpaper, and arbitrarily-placed graphics are irresistible to your average DB.  DBs will flock to this like skid marks on grandpa's undies, as these lemmings are too narcissistic to even bother reading what the shirt says.  This epic innovation by Douché will turn tedious DB-spotting into a fun recreational pastime for all your friends and family!  Kudos to you Douché for providing value to both ends of the spectrum.